Why Is the Bourbon Gone?

[Conversation from last night.]

Honey, fix me a drink? If you look in the kitchen, I bought all kinds of condiments to make drinks with – olives, oranges, cherries, limes, lemons…

We’re out of bourbon.

Oh, shit. I didn't know. It wasn't on the grocery list. Well, surprise me. I like anything you fix me.

What about a Gin Fizz?


Gin Ricky?

Umm… Do we have any rum?

Yeah, we’ve got everything except bourbon. Lemme see what I can come up with.

[Sounds of bottles being moved around. Refrigerator door opens and closes. More movement in the kitchen. The sound of ice in a shaker.]

Here. Try this. I chilled the glass beforehand.

[Old-fashioned glass appears on the table with an amber liquid and a half-dollar size thinly sliced piece of lemon rind. The smell of scotch fills the immediate area. The mental drink catalogue knows what it is without sipping it. Glass to lips, the burn softened by the vermouth, feel the throat warm up as the drink goes down.]

Oh, that’s good.

I used the 10-year [-old single malt].

[Some days call for a cocktail. Some days call for two. From the week I had with my volunteer “job”, I may go through that entire fifth before the weekend is over. Good thing Santa brought him two fifths.]


  1. BLECH! Scotch. I just don't have a taste for it. Most of my friends drink the stuff and think I'm crazy. Guess I'm just a cold beer kinda girl... Ha! Classy, huh? And only the first one has to be cold. After that they can just be rodeo-cool. {Ya hear Tom Jones singin' "She's a Lady" in the background?}

  2. Ahhh- a drink after my ane Scots heart!

  3. YUK.. although it was pretty good mixed with Yellow's Irn Bru!!LOL We have FIVE scotch drinkers in our family.. you'd think I'd have gotten the bug.. lol