MRS. GAELIC
Can you come do this for me, Mister Fire Starter? You're so good at it. I'm not good at starting fires.
MR. GAELIC
Sure. [long pause with a deep thoughtful expression on his face] Tu est très bon dans la chambre.
Deirdre walks up behind her father with a wrinkly nose.
DEIRDRE
Ewwwwww. You made me take French. I've had French. That's gross. I don't want to know that.
Mrs. Gaelic is almost on all fours laughing so hard.
DEIRDRE
You can't do French. You can't do Russian. Forget about German. You'll have to learn sign language.
MRS. GAELIC
I could do sign language for that too.
DEIRDRE
Yeah, right.
Out of Mr. Gaelic's line of sight, Mrs. Gaelic makes a sign which cannot be repeated on prime time blogs.
DEIRDRE
Ewwww.
Both Mrs. Gaelic and Deirdre erupt into laughter.
The secret to making a fire is to have some of those "fat sticks" on hands: these are long slim pieces from a log which are imbued with some kind of grease or some such. They burn very hot and almost never fail to cause the other firewood to catch fire. I can't help with French, however, since I was thrown out of that class in High School. Quite literally thrown out: Mr. h propelled me toward the door with such speed that it was only the quick work of the boy who sat next to it in springing up and throwing it open in a timely fashion that prevented me from smashing nto it face first. I had an odd effect on teachers; Mr. H. was more vigorous in displaying this than most, but it was never far from the surface in any of them.
ReplyDeleteSo did you get the fire started?
It is important to learn Swahili for just these situations.
ReplyDelete@David, Mr. G got it going. A nice roaring fire. Isn't that what men are for? Maybe the Fat Sticks would be less trouble than dealing with a man???
ReplyDelete@Laoch, Ahsante!
We get a big box, like 30 pounds worth from LL Bean and it makes starting a fire so much easier. And men..well what can you really say?
ReplyDeleteI like Loach's comment. ;-)
ReplyDelete